Does this Need to be Said?

December 16, 2011

Click here to listen to today’s Daily Power Prayer for Loving Communication!:

I shared in the Finding Freedom Class that I saw a video by Craig Ferguson where he said that it took him 3 marriages to learn that when he’s angry he needs to ask himself three questions before he says anything out of anger:

Does this need to be said?
Does this need to be said by ME?
Does this need to be said by me NOW?

It’s a good rule of thumb. I used to feel that it was absolutely necessary to say everything I thought with absolute authority. I’d try to make people understand how I felt and what I was thinking at every turn without actually pondering if it was worth it.

Our feelings are so important.
We must honor our feelings.
And we do that by being mindful.

We can hear it 1,000 times, but can we live it?

For me, it’s more important to feel how I feel, and feel what I feel – then to have someone else understand it. When I honor myself, sometimes I don’t need to share with anyone else. I feel great without sharing – sometimes sharing will actually put me in a position of going into the intellect or seeking pity, without ever TRULY feeling what is going on.

This is why it’s so valuable to cultivate the ability to be present with ourselves.

Love is the main thing. Living a life of Love sometimes means contemplating before speaking or simply smiling the smile of Love and not saying anything. What words can possibly describe how the heart feels? Sometimes it’s best to simply and sweetly be.


I AM living a life of Love.


A Course in Miracles, ACIM, How to forgive, Jennifer Hadley, Living A Course in Miracles, Spiritual classes

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  1. So often, I am thinking about something and then read it on your blog afterwards, Jennifer. Makes me realize how truly connected we are, outside of time and space. I am grateful to see what my eyes cannot show me.

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