I used to believe that it was OK to manipulate people with my attitudes. I grew up thinking that having an attitude, or getting into a mood was a way to effectively control and manipulate people to have them pay attention to me and do what I wanted.
I learned that if I was angry people would try to appease me.
I learned that if I was cold and distant people would inquire what was wrong and try to help me.
I learned that if I was sad people might comfort me.
Mostly I learned that manipulating people made me feel sick energetically.
In all of my relationships I found that others were manipulating me as much as I was manipulating them. It all felt SUPER uncomfortable, but that’s just the way it was. Everybody did it.
As I began to achieve some spiritual maturity I realized that manipulating others, for any reason or in any way was a source of my suffering and theirs. It lacks authenticity and discourages intimacy – two things I deeply value.
I dropped the controlling and manipulating behaviors and now I notice that I rarely encounter anyone who tries to pull that behavior with me. If they do, I have compassion, because I know it comes from a place of deep wounding and suffering and I’m interested in Love, which is our healer.
I invite you to take a look at where you give yourself permission to manipulate people with your moods and attitudes. It creates more trouble than it could ever be worth. The worst fall out is that it will degrade your personal sense of self-esteem and worthiness.
Having loving relationship builds self-esteem and worthiness and that’s a far better investment of your precious energy.
My free Living A Course in Miracles class series is about to begin! Our first class is focused on relationships and healing. We have 16 classes – all totally free if you register now – class begins on September 5th! Please join Gary Renard, Colin Tipping, Nouk Sanchez, Regina Dawn Akers, myself and more! Register now and we’ll make sure you get all the details! Everything is at Living A Course in Miracles .com.