I was talking with a close friend who was very upset about someone she loves. What this person does is so upsetting, she told me. Really upsetting.

Because we’re close, I could say to her the thing I say to myself.

I’m not bothered by my loved one. I’m bothered by my thoughts about my loved one.

I’m not bothered by what she’s doing. I’m bothered by my thoughts about what she’s doing.

Learning to accept this FACT is deeply healing.  Our upset isn’t wrong, it’s a pretty normal reaction to a false belief.

The facts are that my loved one is having her experience and she’s making her choices. I might not agree with them, and I might not like them, but that isn’t what upsets me. What upsets me is that I’ve chosen to think fearful thoughts about her that are unkind, attacking, and blaming.

Lesson 5 in the ACIM Workbook says it in seven very helpful words.

I am never upset for the reason I think.

This idea, like the preceding one, can be used with any person, situation or event you think is causing you pain.

Any person. Any situation. Any event. No exceptions offered anywhere in the lesson.

I lost my mind, and then I blamed her for it.  How crazy is that?

Here’s what’s made a difference for me: I don’t have to work out WHY I’m upset. I only have to get curious instead of certain. Be curious, not judgmental, as Ted Lasso says. That’s the way out of being upset.

Try it for a few days, keep track. Use your phone, or a scrap of paper, however you’d like to do it. How many times a day do you get upset? How many times a day do you feel frustrated, irritated, worried, anxious, hurt, or lonely?  ALL because of your interpretation.  Can you become curious instead of judgmental?

The ACIM Workbook gives us a line to say before we look.

There are no small upsets. They are all equally disturbing to my peace of mind.

The big upsets and the small ones are the same mistake wearing different costumes. That’s why the lesson refuses to rank them.

What I notice as I walk this path is that my upsets are fewer and further between. I’m mostly peaceful now, and there was a time I never once imagined that was possible for me.

Good Lord, that’s a gift worth sharing!!

When there’s no judgment the Love can flow and that’s quite a gift.

TODAY Free Forgiveness Workshop – Monday, Labor Day, September 7th.  Sign up now and I’ll see you shortly! 

SEPTEMBER: How about some free classes with great ACIM teachers? Living A Course in Miracles: Release the Worry, Rest in Trust is open for registration now! Worry isn’t natural. It’s a habit, and habits can be dissolved when we’re truly willing. That’s what we’re doing together September 10 through 13 in my FREE series. 5 teachers, 8 classes, 4 days, and every one of us has walked through the worry ourselves and come out the other side. We’ll look at what worry actually is in the mind, why willpower has never once dissolved it, and how to hand the future over so we can rest even while life is still unresolved. Not denial. Not pretending we’re fine. A real change of mind. It’s FREE, and I’d love to have you with us. Register now so you don’t forget at powerofloveministry.net/Release

SEPTEMBER: My Finding Freedom From Fear Spiritual Bootcamp is 90 days of moving out of coping and into real trust, faith and listening to the higher wisdom, together. This is my longest running program – popular because it is such a game changer. Are you up for truly moving past fear? I only offer this once per year – We start in September! Click here now to learn more now.

LATEST PODCAST EPISODE: Why You Can’t Skip Forgiveness with Keith Kavanagh I’m joined this week by Keith Kavanagh, calling in from just outside Dublin. We go straight at the step almost every ACIM student quietly skips, and Keith uncovers why there’s no way around it. He also shares the surprising truth about the woman who took down A Course in Miracles and never practiced it, and names the counterintuitive request Jesus makes of us in Chapter 2 when we’re afraid. What ACIM promises isn’t what most of us came for, and it’s better.