I sometimes tell people I have a prosthetic nose because I cut my nose off so many times just to spite my face and I did it by being a grudge holder and refusing to learn from my mis-takes.
I didn’t really understand HOW profoundly different my life could be if I practiced forgiveness all day long. I didn’t believe it. I didn’t trust. And I think it’s because I didn’t understand what TRUE forgiveness is.
True forgiveness IS NOT saying “it’s okay.” How could some of the things that happen to us just be okay? They aren’t.
True forgiveness IS releasing our attachment to the meaning we made of things.
It’s our interpretations of what happened that cause our suffering.
Think about it: Let’s say something happens that feels upsetting. Once it’s over, it’s over, but the meaning we made of it, our interpretation continues on and on and makes the original upset feel like it’s repeating every time we think about it. Sometimes we torture ourselves with the memories.
Each and every time we relive that painful memory there’s a hidden purpose for ruminating on it. Even when it seems like we’re reliving the past over and over, there’s still a hidden purpose and that hidden purpose is … to give us the opportunity to forgive. So, it’s going to keep happening until we finally decide to forgive.
Once I realized that’s why the old memories kept repeating, I decided to start forgiving ASAP so I didn’t have to keep reliving the same unpleasant memories. Enough already! I have MUCH better things to do with my time and energy then be upset about the past again and again.
PLUS, one of the MOST healing things I’ve EVER learned in my entire life isthat to NOT forgive is actually punishing myself again and again. To forgive is to be loving and kind to myself. Being loving and kind to myself is what brings more Love into my life – A LOT more Love.
I am the gatekeeper of Love in my life.
Why? Because when I’m loving to myself, everyone else will treat me with more Love and kindness. I will naturally magnetize and attract people into my life who are more loving and kind to me too. Beautiful! Now, my whole life is improving!
True forgiveness is releasing the judgments and opinions about the past.
That’s the only way to stop recycling the pain of the past. It requires being willing to release the meaning we made of what happened.
For me it’s been so helpful to use the ACIM teaching of “I don’t know what anything is for.” In truth, I really don’t know what anything is for, but I’d like to. I’d like to know the true meaning of things so that I can learn from them the first time and not repeat them.
You perceive the world and everything in it as meaningful in terms of ego goals. These goals have nothing to do with your own best interests, because the ego is not you. This false identification makes you incapable of understanding what anything is for. ~ A Course in Miracles, Workbook Lesson 25
When I think I already know what everything is for, then I’m not open to any learning. How can I be open to learning anything if I’ve already decided what everything is for?
When I don’t forgive, when I judge, then I keep repeating the past. There’s NO WAY OUT of my suffering until I’m willing to release the meaning I made of it.
Forgiveness is my Freedom!
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