I used to get upset so often and so easily. I had a very strong habit, almost an addiction, to taking offense. Being offended gave me a sense of power. And that’s how I learned that taking offense, criticizing and complaining are ways that those who don’t feel powerful can try to get some kind of sense of power. Unfortunately, it backfires every single time and just leaves us feeling weaker and more depleted. I feel like I wrote the book on that!
One of the most challenging things for me to grasp, and for many spiritual students is that we’re not upset for the reason we think we are. (Lesson 5 of A Course in Miracles.) For instance, if we’re upset because our loved ones aren’t behaving the way we think they should behave we’ll always be incorrect.
We’ve been trained to blame our upset on others, but that doesn’t make it right.
Blaming another for how we feel is the habit of someone who fears taking responsibility for their choices. And that’s a rough place to be. I know. I lived there for a long time. I don’t ever want to go back – even for a visit.
I LOVE, LOVE, LOVE this quote:
“The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort, but where he stands at times of challenge and controversy.” Martin Luther King, Jr.
If we’re willing to look beyond the surface of our distress, we can finally discover that we’re actually upset because, although we pretend to be committed to be unconditionally loving, we’ve given ourselves permission to judge our loved ones whenever we feel like it.
When we have the courage to look a little bit deeper and we’ll discover that those judgments we’re holding against our loved ones – our opinions of what they should and shouldn’t be doing – are, by nature, thoughts of attack, with a violent energetic.
There’s a huge gap between being unconditionally loving and giving ourselves permission to mentally attack whenever we feel like it. And deep down we know it. It’s blatant hypocrisy. And THAT is the actual cause of our upset.
Deep down, we’re upset because we’ve given ourselves permission to be unkind, unloving and unjust.
On a spiritual level, it’s a profound betrayal of self. It’s also a form of terrorism. And we can pretend no one is noticing, but there’s only ONE MIND, so there’s no where to hide. And we know it.
What’s the cure?
Forgiveness.
We forgive ourselves and become willing to replace the habit of judging with a commitment to compassion. Compassion is Love and Love is the healer. When we heal the inner terrorist we heal terrorism in the world for All is One, all minds ARE joined. It’s so beautifully healing when we can be grateful we’re response-ABLE and exercise our ability to respond with Love. What a blessing!
So many people know that they need to “let it go,” but they don’t.
They don’t let it go, in part, because they don’t know how. They don’t let it go, in part, because they don’t have the support to be willing. And that’s why Spirit has had designed our Power of Love Ministry programs to offer lots of support, and clear steps for success, because our success (in forgiveness) is so powerful and so important. Yes, important.
It’s important to be able to leave the past behind and live our true purpose. Forgiveness makes that possible.
The more this community grows, and strengthens, and demonstrates the miracles that are possible for us – on all levels: mentally, emotionally, physically, in relationships and finances and more – the more grateful I am that I said yes to leading this community.
And I’m so glad we’re prayer partners!
