Avoiding Regret

Like a lot of teenagers, I fell in love with music.  I listened to music as much as possible for decades.  

 

When I was in my mid 20’s I decided to invest in some quality stereo equipment.  The CD player was still new.  At that time, I was working for a woman was producing a documentary film series on rock and roll and so I went to the editor, Mike, because he knew a lot about sound equipment from editing sound.

 

I asked Mike if he could advise me about what to buy with my budget, and he gave me some of the best advice I’ve ever gotten.  He told me that if I wished to get the best equipment for my budget that I should do this:

 

Take one or two of my favorite CD’s to five different stereo stores.  In each store, tell the sales person what my budget was and then listen to their spiel.  They’d have me listen to many different speakers playing my CD’s.  After all those conversations and listening experiences I would likely know EXACTLY what to get for my preferences and my budget.

 

At the time, I didn’t feel like doing that.  I really wanted him to just tell me what to get, but I knew his advice was solid so I did exactly that and I bought a system that lasted me for decades.  

 

Here’s the other super important advice Mike gave me that I’ve never forgotten:  generally, whenever you invest in something substantial, there will come a day when you have some buyers remorse.  When that day comes you might think, “I should’ve shopped around.  I shouldn’t have bought that just because my friend suggested it.  I should’ve done my own research.  I shouldn’t have gotten it just because it was a great deal.”  If you do what I’m suggesting, you’ll avoid that future regret, and that’s really worth it.

 

I knew instantly that he was right.  As an act of self-Love, I did what he suggested and never had any regrets.  

 

Ever since then, I do that for any high-ticket item, whether it’s a car, a refrigerator, an attorney or a spiritual counselor.  I shop around.  I talk to people.  I look at the specifics and I don’t have regret.

 

Regret is an awful feeling.  The should’ve, could’ve, would’ve’s.  Regret is a judgment that we should’ve done better, been better, that we could’ve chosen higher, but we didn’t.  It’s a sickening kind of feeling that feeds a deep and persistent sense of “I’m not enough.  I’m bad.”

 

Remember the story of the grandfather, the grandchild and the two wolves?

 

The grandfather tells the child that two wolves are battling for his soul – a good wolf, and a bad wolf.  

 

The child asks “who will win?”

 

The grandfather says, “the one I feed.”

 

Let’s not feed that insatiable ego thought pattern of “I’m unworthy, bad, wrong, unlovable.”

 

Let’s not lay the ground and plant the seeds of future regret anymore.  Out of self-Love, let’s do the best we can now.  It’s a good habit to get into, and I’m still improving every day.  

My Self-Love online workshop is Sunday, March 17th – let’s launch into spring with love!  Love is the great healer of EVERYTHING and we can actually love ourselves free of the past and the pain.  If you find you’re hard on yourself, this may be the workshop for you.  Follow your intuition – if it’s right for you right now, you’ll know.

TODAY: FREE Forgiveness Workshop Sunday, March 10! All are welcome – please share with friends and loved ones!