I have a niece and three nephews, plus a goddaughter and other children in my life. Some of them aren’t children anymore. Loving them as they’re growing up, from infancy to adulthood, I’m aware of how completely I Love and accept them, although sometimes I don’t understand or don’t like their choices, the Love I feel is constant and unconditional.
As I observed these beautiful beings coming into my life and “falling in Love” with them, I realized that I was not so loving with myself. Where I wouldn’t judge them at all, I would be very hard on myself for the same behaviors. Having this realization really helped me.
In large part because of my Love for these children, I realized how incredibly hard on myself I was. I made a decision. I decided to do things differently.
I started to treat myself the way I would treat the precious children in my life. I began to practice Self-compassion in a big, big way. It was truy healing and life-changing for me.
One of the techniques that really helped me was to imagine my nephew Alex when he was 3 years old. He was such a cuddly sweet little muffin of a boy. He has a huge heart and so wide-open to life. He was incredibly easy to share Love with and he was very affectionate.
When I would feel upset with myself, I’d think of Alex. Precious boy. And I knew I would never, EVER in a million years yell at that sweet boy or say one unkind word to him. So, I decided to extend to myself the same kindness and compassion.
Again, it’s the decision that’s so important.
We are deciders.
Deciding to be loving is one of the ways we transform our lives.
Be willing to pause when you’re in a self-attack and think of someone you dearly Love.
Someone who is so completely precious to you. Consider if you’d speak to them the way you’re speaking to yourself.
See if you can begin your self-talk with words like: Darling, sweetheart, precious one.
I would remind myself that I am the Beloved of the THE Beloved and my thoughts are powerful and precious. This one thought was very helpful to me in remembering to have compassion for myself.
Children learn best when they feel safe and loved, not when there’s a threat of punishment. The same is true of adults and ourselves. Love is our healer. Compassion is Love.
Love is what we are.
The way to get in touch with our true identity is to value ourselves. It’s not that complicated. It’s not hard, even when it feels hard.
Here’s a key – turn it over, hand it UP to the Higher Holy Spirit Self and stop trying to figure it out.
The more loving we are, the more we can tell that the false belief feels false and the more we can notice that the Love feels real. Our willingness greatly improves our ability to recognize the true from the false. If we’re not willing to know the truth, we’ll just keep swimming in the false, until we feel like we’re drowning.
Self-compassion is a practice we can learn until we no longer feel attracted to punishment. The more we practice compassion with others, the easier it is to practice compassion with ourselves and vice versa.
Today’s a good day to practice!
