I used to go to events expecting to be mistreated. And if they didn’t mistreat me, I’d find some way to interpret what they did as mistreatment because I was so intent on it.
Sound familiar?
A Course in Miracles teaches us something profound: “The wish to be unfairly treated is a compromise attempt that would combine attack and innocence.”
When we’re entrenched in victim consciousness, we actually invite people to crucify us. We’re looking to be right about how much we’re a victim.
The Magnetic Pull of Victimhood
I know how this feels. There’s this egoic wanting/needing/craving to bring things to a head—to have that righteous sense of “I am the victim, therefore I’m better than you. You are the attacker. I am innocent and you are not.”
But here’s what I realized:
When we allow someone to mistreat us, we’re making a real error.
It’s almost like a form of attack—inviting someone into attacking us.
Because we’re one with them, we experience all the negativity that comes from affirming we deserve to be attacked.
I’ve definitely tried to revel in somebody else’s attack of me so I could claim “I am the innocent victim.” But the Course teaches us that everyone is innocent and no one is a victim – and that truth IS liberation.
Breaking the Pattern
For me, being curious is one of the most helpful things in my spiritual practice. Asking these questions from curiosity without fear: “Why would I wish for this? How is this helpful to me? How is this for my good?” has brought me such helpful insights.
Being in that mindset takes me out of victim consciousness, out of crucifixion, out of sacrifice, and into exploration, inquiry, Peace, Joy, Love.
Our Invitation to Freedom
Take a moment to look at any place in your life where you might be feeling mistreated.
Are you contributing to that? Can you take responsibility for it? Can you forgive yourself for it?
In my Masterful Living Program (starts in January), we practice releasing these patterns permanently. Because when we stop inviting attack, we start inviting miracles.
Victim consciousness keeps us playing very, very small. We weren’t created to be attacked. We were created to be loved. Isn’t it time for us to stop settling for less than Love?
If you’re still upset about your relationship with your mother or daughter, you haven’t fully forgiven—and that’s not your fault. Saturday, November 15th at 3 PM Eastern, join me for a powerful 2.5-hour Deep Dive Workshop Healing Mother Daughter Wounds, a Deep Dive Workshop. Whether your mother or daughter is living or gone, speaking to you or estranged, these tools work because all minds are joined. Your healing becomes her healing. Bring your willingness, and I’ll bring the tools that transform decades of pain into peace. Register now—your breakthrough is waiting.
Masterful Living Program 2026 – Registration is open!
The sooner you register the more bonuses you get! Click here now to learn more.
LATEST ACIM PODCAST EPISODE: In this episode, God Doesn’t Punish You (You Do),I reveal how the belief that God punishes us is completely false—it’s our own projection of guilt and shame that creates all punishment in our lives. I share my decades-long pattern of using alcohol, food, and other self-destructive behaviors to keep myself feeling guilty and reinforce the belief that I was fundamentally bad and sinful, a pattern I finally recognized came from centuries of religious teaching about being unworthy sinners. Through A Course in Miracles teachings from Chapter 3 and Lesson 189, I explain the “law of seeing”—that we perceive outside what we feel inside, so when we feel God’s love within us, we see a loving world, but when we feel self-hatred, we see only fear. As we complete this 9-year cycle, I’m inviting everyone to join me in releasing these ancient patterns of guilt and self-punishment before we begin fresh in 2026.
Thanks Jennifer 💫🙏🏻💞